As you know HBL and I are about to leave leaving today on vacation with some friends and I use that term loosely of ours HBL’s and I’m watching my coveted stash of Xanax dwindle quickly. I’m so stressed about the whole situation I can’t sleep at night, my heart is racing and I’m having massive forking panic attacks.
The whole, what time should I get up in the a.m. so Mrs. Condescending doesn’t call me lazy, is driving me nuts. She gets up at 5:15 a.m. and wears it like a badge of honor. I look at it like a mark of ignorance when you do it and you don’t have to or want to. Now if you want to wake up that early, that’s a different story but she moans like she doesn’t want to be up but then it’s woo hoo look at how forking great I am because I get out of bed at 5:15 a.m. If I, on the other hand, have to get up at 5:15 a.m. I wear it like a big ugly scowl on my face that doesn’t go away until noon if HBL’s lucky.
She also loves to make comments about my passion for sleeping late, like that’s a bad thing? My Grandmother use to go to bed at 6 p.m. and awaken at 4 a.m. and I always wanted to say Mama (that’s what I called her) why not try staying up a little later and then you wouldn’t wake up so early with nothing to do, but I knew it would fall on deaf ears since she was an old farm wife and getting up at 4 a.m. was something she’d done out of necessity all her life and it had become a habit. Such is not the case with Mrs. Conde.
Mrs. Condescending isn’t employed outside the home and her children are grown plus she refuses to keep any of her grandchildren because she “just doesn’t want to” (spoken in some weird sort of baby speak with her arms folded across her chest, and her head thrown back so she can look down upon a person as she speaks).
HBL keeps trying to convince telling me we’ll have a great time and if nothing else, I’ll have plenty of things to bitch write about here. I keep responding, “That is IF the plane doesn’t crash and we make it back alive”. He just rolls his eyes and I run count how many Xanax I have left. I’m rationing them just in case.
Have I mentioned I hate to fly? It’s going to be a great vacation and I will come back alive…..it’s going to be a great vacation and I will come back alive…..it’s going to be a great vacation…………………
HAPPY TRAILS, Y’ALL
The photo in this post, is of one of my Granddaughters perched inside in the windowsill because she’s afraid of the water.
July 18, 2008 at 6:58 am
Now, you realize the only reason she is condescending and critical of you is that she is jealous and wishes she could be more like you. When she makes her snide remarks, just smile and let them roll off. She’ll be so disappointed. And remember that the only way she can feel good about herself is to make you feel bad…so don’t let it happen and ENJOY your vacation!!
PS…as for the sleeping in…some comebacks, if you please or dare:
“Well, hubby and I were up really late (wink, wink), so we needed our rest.”
“Yes, I like to get my beauty sleep. You should try it sometime.”
“Only the elderly are early risers and I’m just not that old yet.”
July 18, 2008 at 11:52 am
That is a beautiful grandbaby. I want one!
As for your “friend”, just carry on taking pictures of her fashion show with your iPhone (I want one!).
Thinking about people all over the country (maybe world?) enjoying her as an example of what not to wear might help take the edge off those snide comments.
July 18, 2008 at 4:27 pm
You are going to have a great time! Don’t worry about the flight…millions of flights arrive at their destinations every day! And as for Mrs. Conde…screw her! What do you care what she thinks? Go have fun dammit! You deserve it!